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While waiting on the platform for our train we saw the prototype new #MTA subway train zip by. So retro!
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Thursday, May 24, 2018
The #MTA's Next Gen Subway Car
While waiting on the platform for our train we saw the prototype new #MTA subway train zip by. So retro!
THIS IS A PARODY OF NEWS
Tuesday, May 22, 2018
No more cake decorating typos with AutoCorrect in a cake decoration bag
Let Them Eat Cate!
You may have had your last "Barfday" cake.
It has happened too often, you get a great cake and order a message to be written in the frosting only to find out too late that your cake has a typo, "Congradulations" or "Get Eel Soon". Worry no more, Pillsbury has announced Cake Frosting Bag with AutoCorrection!
Now anyone can write in frosting like a pro with Pillsbury Flavored Filled Auto-Correct Pastry Bags. Using the built-in typo detection, you can present your message or phrase on a cake with confidence. It’s all of the fun, none of the frustration.
Pillsbury AutoCorrect is a feature commonly found in word processing programs, such as Microsoft Word. As the name implies, this feature automatically corrects misspellings and common typos made on cakes for any occasion.
AutoCorrect also has a built in NSFW filter to censor your list of prohibited words.
AutoCorrect is available in vanilla, cream cheese, chocolate fudge and cherry flavors in the software or baking aisle of your local grocer.
THIS IS A PARODY OF NEWS
You may have had your last "Barfday" cake.
It has happened too often, you get a great cake and order a message to be written in the frosting only to find out too late that your cake has a typo, "Congradulations" or "Get Eel Soon". Worry no more, Pillsbury has announced Cake Frosting Bag with AutoCorrection!
Now anyone can write in frosting like a pro with Pillsbury Flavored Filled Auto-Correct Pastry Bags. Using the built-in typo detection, you can present your message or phrase on a cake with confidence. It’s all of the fun, none of the frustration.
Pillsbury AutoCorrect is a feature commonly found in word processing programs, such as Microsoft Word. As the name implies, this feature automatically corrects misspellings and common typos made on cakes for any occasion.
AutoCorrect also has a built in NSFW filter to censor your list of prohibited words.
AutoCorrect is available in vanilla, cream cheese, chocolate fudge and cherry flavors in the software or baking aisle of your local grocer.
THIS IS A PARODY OF NEWS
Sunday, April 1, 2018
Cool updates to your coffee maker software that you want
The KitchenAid coffee maker upgrade is here!
Like many of you, I have been awaiting the release of the new operating system for the popular KitchenAid 12-Cup Coffeemakers. It was promised in the second quarter of 2018, and select consumers are waking up to new cafe features on their counter.
After you upgrade the operating system to KA2.3 you will wonder how you lived without these new features!
Highlights of the ALL NEW KA2.3 Features
VR Brew
Most exciting is the virtual reality brew setting. Indicates the brewed coffee is steaming hot, ready to serve, even if you don’t touch the stuff IRL. A popular request and has been offered on K-Cups since early 2017.
Programmable tones
No more harsh beeping, load your favorite tones to alert you on, off and ready status—or you can turn off all sounds.
ReBru
How many times have you made a pot of coffee while you are half-asleep and the coffee is too weak, too strong or worse full of grinds. Press ReBru and the machine express brews your first pot of the day using learned characteristics so you don't have to think.
Add Milk and Sugar selector
Lets you make coffee to suit your preferences. A feature you're going to love.
Prepare for upgrade
This update takes approximately 20 minutes and requires your coffee pot to be running on an electric power supply.
Like many of you, I have been awaiting the release of the new operating system for the popular KitchenAid 12-Cup Coffeemakers. It was promised in the second quarter of 2018, and select consumers are waking up to new cafe features on their counter.
After you upgrade the operating system to KA2.3 you will wonder how you lived without these new features!
Highlights of the ALL NEW KA2.3 Features
VR Brew
Most exciting is the virtual reality brew setting. Indicates the brewed coffee is steaming hot, ready to serve, even if you don’t touch the stuff IRL. A popular request and has been offered on K-Cups since early 2017.
Programmable tones
No more harsh beeping, load your favorite tones to alert you on, off and ready status—or you can turn off all sounds.
ReBru
How many times have you made a pot of coffee while you are half-asleep and the coffee is too weak, too strong or worse full of grinds. Press ReBru and the machine express brews your first pot of the day using learned characteristics so you don't have to think.
Add Milk and Sugar selector
Lets you make coffee to suit your preferences. A feature you're going to love.
Prepare for upgrade
- Thoroughly clean basket of grinds and rinse carafe.
- Set coffee maker into command mode:
- Press and hold the Brew and Clock buttons for 90 seconds until coffee maker beeps 4 times.
- Follow prompts.
This update takes approximately 20 minutes and requires your coffee pot to be running on an electric power supply.
Tuesday, February 13, 2018
Canada unveils USA-CAN Border Slide
The skier missing on Whiteface Mountain since last Wednesday and presumed dead has been found alive and well in California. New York state police confirmed that the 49 year old Canadian man is in good health and in contact with local authorities in Sacramento.
Danny has been on a secret mission. Danny "vanished" while skiing with friends.
Until now there were no details on why he disappeared. After a 5-day search, of Whiteface Mountain in Wilmington, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau unveiled the Border Slide. Built entirely with money from the United States, this slide will be used to send illegals back south. The immigrants are filling border towns, burdening public services and pestering friendly Canadians.
It’s a surprising turn of events given that the U.S. initiated the Nafta revamp last year by saying it wanted to address its gaping trade deficit with Mexico, while only seeking tweaks to the trading terms with Canada. Relations between the U.S. and Canada were frosty when the talks started in August as U.S. President Trump dismissed a Canadian proposal on cars as vague and sparred with Canada over data describing two-way trade flows. He also criticized a trade case filed by Canada against the U.S. at the World Trade Organization as a “massive attack” on American trade law.
Trump mocked the Border Slide on Twitter saying "Canada built a water theme park for aliens and is treating American citizens as illegals. So sad."
The White House has no official comment on the secret Border Slide project.
THIS IS A PARODY OF NEWS
Danny has been on a secret mission. Danny "vanished" while skiing with friends.
It’s a surprising turn of events given that the U.S. initiated the Nafta revamp last year by saying it wanted to address its gaping trade deficit with Mexico, while only seeking tweaks to the trading terms with Canada. Relations between the U.S. and Canada were frosty when the talks started in August as U.S. President Trump dismissed a Canadian proposal on cars as vague and sparred with Canada over data describing two-way trade flows. He also criticized a trade case filed by Canada against the U.S. at the World Trade Organization as a “massive attack” on American trade law.
Trump mocked the Border Slide on Twitter saying "Canada built a water theme park for aliens and is treating American citizens as illegals. So sad."
The White House has no official comment on the secret Border Slide project.
THIS IS A PARODY OF NEWS
Sunday, February 11, 2018
Renegade News Mental Medal award
The president of RNS MEDIA, Renegade News parent company, has developed the Renegade News Mental Medal award, the highest honor on earth that is given to a satirical news site. The RNMM award is given out randomly, like lollipops at a rave on South Beach, to satire news sites found on the internets. Congratulate yourself if you have been awarded the RNMM award.
RNS MEDIA hosts a black tie dinner and award presentations twice a year at a secret club and Renegade News makes an insignificant donation to the Relax Steve campaign to memorialize the occasion.
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