In a surprise to everyone, ex-Mayor of Surnise, Florida, John Lomelo was freed from prison last weekend...
Friday, November 25, 1988
Wednesday, October 26, 1988
New Candidate Spins In
...Pat Sajak, long-time host of "Wheel of Fortune", has years of experience dealing with...
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| From Renegade News - the news we twist to fit |
Thursday, September 1, 1988
Thursday, June 16, 1988
Farming Belt drought plan
This was written when farmers were experiencing a horrible drought in the mid 80s...
In a related story, Yuppies from all over the country are sending in their Perrier brand water to the nation's farming belt to help fight the drought. Farmers appreciate the bottled water effort, but noted one side effect. Last week, several cows in one man's stockyard had the urge to steal a BMW and drive recklessly across Nebraska. RENEGADE NEWS -- The News We Twist To Fit {tm}06/16/88
Texaco Tries Titillating Technique
The financially troubled Texaco Oil Company told Renegade News it plans to
tap a new market in an effort to bring their balance sheet into the
black. All service stations in the thirteen state drought-stricken
area of the nation will be converted from selling gasoline to selling
tap water.
Water will come in three varieties, similar to the gas they will
replace.
REGULAR water will be equivalent to the water in residential homes.
A MID-GRADE water, to help plants grow faster, will have a higher
phosphate base like the water that leaves your washing machine.
And a HIGH TEST water will be similar to water taken from the cooling
towers at your nearby nuclear power plant.
In a related story, Yuppies from all over the country are sending in
their Perrier brand water to the nation's farming belt to help fight
the drought. Farmers appreciate the bottled water effort, but noted one
side effect. Last week, several cows in one man's stockyard had the
urge to steal a BMW and drive recklessly across Nebraska.
RENEGADE NEWS -- The News We Twist To Fit {tm}
06/16/88
tap a new market in an effort to bring their balance sheet into the
black. All service stations in the thirteen state drought-stricken
area of the nation will be converted from selling gasoline to selling
tap water.
Water will come in three varieties, similar to the gas they will
replace.
REGULAR water will be equivalent to the water in residential homes.
A MID-GRADE water, to help plants grow faster, will have a higher
phosphate base like the water that leaves your washing machine.
And a HIGH TEST water will be similar to water taken from the cooling
towers at your nearby nuclear power plant.
In a related story, Yuppies from all over the country are sending in
their Perrier brand water to the nation's farming belt to help fight
the drought. Farmers appreciate the bottled water effort, but noted one
side effect. Last week, several cows in one man's stockyard had the
urge to steal a BMW and drive recklessly across Nebraska.
RENEGADE NEWS -- The News We Twist To Fit {tm}
06/16/88
Wednesday, June 1, 1988
Profit Producing Pavement / Soviets Advertise Airwaves / California Child Craze / Fake Food Fat
Profit Producing Pavement?
Soviets Advertise Airwaves
California Child Craze
Fake Food Fat
Soviets Advertise Airwaves
California Child Craze
Fake Food Fat
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| From Renegade News - the news we twist to fit |
Friday, May 6, 1988
Solidarity / Reagan Psychic / Aloha Airlines
Solidarity Still Striking: In Warsaw, Poland, labor negotiators went to a massive steel mill where...
President pursues Psychic Predictions: Not to the country's amazement, President Ronald Reagan has been using an astrologist to help him plan his day...
Aloha Ascends above all: Aloha Airlines jet broke apart over Hawaii last week
President pursues Psychic Predictions: Not to the country's amazement, President Ronald Reagan has been using an astrologist to help him plan his day...
Aloha Ascends above all: Aloha Airlines jet broke apart over Hawaii last week
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| From Renegade News - the news we twist to fit |
Friday, April 22, 1988
Libyan Leader / Ireland / Claude Pepper / Escargot / Taxes / New York Nicotine / Greenhouse / Pink Floyd
Libyan Leader Linked to Rock-n-Roll
Ireland Invaded
Claude Pepper Honored in Dedication
Look at that Escargot
Taxes Taking Toll
New York Nixes Nicotine
Greenhouse Heats Up
Pink Floyd fined for Frenzy
Ireland Invaded
Claude Pepper Honored in Dedication
Look at that Escargot
Taxes Taking Toll
New York Nixes Nicotine
Greenhouse Heats Up
Pink Floyd fined for Frenzy
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| From Renegade News - the news we twist to fit |
Monday, March 7, 1988
Delta missing bags / Panama sees Red / Vanna pick me a letter
Three stories today
- Delta finds missing bags: Amelia Earhart is alive and well.
- Unrest in Panama
- Oh Vanna, Pick Me A Letter: Changes come with Rate hike
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| From Renegade News - the news we twist to fit |
Tuesday, February 23, 1988
Kidnappers Captured / Lebanon Gets New Direction
Unconfirmed sources told our Renegade News Mid-East reporter that the three terrorists who kidnapped a U.S. Marine in...
and Donald Trump purchased land rights for...
and Donald Trump purchased land rights for...
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| From Renegade News - the news we twist to fit |
Thursday, February 18, 1988
Winter Olympics Turn Tepid
When Reagan and Gorbachev met at their summit meeting last Summer, presidential advisors said the arms reduction act would severely reduce the competitive nature of Winter Games...
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| From Renegade News - the news we twist to fit |
Tuesday, February 16, 1988
Eastern Begins New Ad Campaign
Our Renegade News aviation reporter told us that beginning Monday, Eastern Airlines playing a new advertising jingle...
and Chinese New Year Starts with a bang...
and Chinese New Year Starts with a bang...
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| From Renegade News - the news we twist to fit |
Monday, February 15, 1988
Yah-Weh members form new cult
Last summer, a dejected Yahweh Tribe member formed a dissident group called The Yah-Hoo Tribe.
Wednesday, February 10, 1988
Star Wars Test is In The Bag
A Star Wars satellite packed with advanced censors tracked down a set of phony targets in a $250 million test of technology vital to placement of future space stations...
Thursday, February 4, 1988
Florida Panther - Cat Smuggling
We at Renegade News wanted to know just why endangered Florida Panthers are being killed by automibles every year...
Wednesday, February 3, 1988
Ocean Spray Floods New England
Last week CBS News announced that Ocean Spray Cranberries of Plymouth, Mass. was being fined for dumping toxic chemicals into the water supply.
This week Renegade News discovered exactly what toxic chemicals were being dumped...
This week Renegade News discovered exactly what toxic chemicals were being dumped...
Sunday, January 24, 1988
Friday, January 22, 1988
Sunday, January 17, 1988
CBS drops The Greek
Jimmy The Greek Snyder, who was a sportscaster at CBS for twelve years was fired on Saturday for making racial comments about Black atheletes...
Saturday, January 16, 1988
Reagan gives Thumbs Up after procedure
Official word is that President Reagan had a colonoscopy and no evidence of...
Monday, January 11, 1988
Pittsburgh familes tap profits
Pittsburgh residents rejoiced late Sunday when officials began pumping water to their homes after a week with dry taps.
According to a survey taken by Renegade News, 4 out of 5 families in the metropolitan Pittsburgh area struck it rich late Sunday evening when they went to their sinks. City officials claim the water is safe to drink, but OPEC officials are offering residents $28 a barrel for tap water.
RENEGADE NEWS -- The News We Twist To Fit (tm)
According to a survey taken by Renegade News, 4 out of 5 families in the metropolitan Pittsburgh area struck it rich late Sunday evening when they went to their sinks. City officials claim the water is safe to drink, but OPEC officials are offering residents $28 a barrel for tap water.
RENEGADE NEWS -- The News We Twist To Fit (tm)
Friday, January 8, 1988
Florida Lottery starts on Tuesday / Prices cut on Airlines
Florida Lottery begins next week. Merchants are confused as to who will be selling tickets and when they will receive sales kits...
Continental Airlines cuts 25% to 30% off alltickets purchased...
Continental Airlines cuts 25% to 30% off alltickets purchased...
