Automatic Toilet and Urinal Flushers are Spy Cameras?

SpyCam in Auto Flush devices cause thousands to scramble!


It was thought to be the innovation of the decade. Auto Flush Toilets. A germ-o-phobes delight. No more twisting into yoga positions to use elbows and feet to flush in a public bathroom, no more gifts left for the next patron. Just do your business, walk away and by the time you wash your hands, the toilet is clean and shiny.


A man in Semplice, Texas received a shocking surprise when he discovered the sensor in the toilet flush was actually video taping his movement. His bluetooth video cell phone suddenly started playing a video of a man wearing the same t-shirt as him. It wasn't until he stood up that the man realized it was him on camera.

According to research, all toilet flushers are bluetooth equipped for routine maintenance and he must have knocked into this CAN LAN and the Man Ran.

Our liaison of lavatory mavens did a random sampling of 300 auto flushers in mens and womens public bathrooms, all turning up with built in cameras. And pressing the manual button on the flusher enabled bluetooth video broadcast on 80% of these devices. Evidently engineers didn't think anyone would ever manually flush an auto flush toilet.

We contacted four leading makers and none had a comment, except for April Fool's Day.   Enjoy the rest of the day and don't get sucked in by any Pranks ☺.

Remember: Nothing in toilet except toilet paper; Flush toilet after use; WASH your hands with soap.

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Mrs Claus caught kissing Tiger Woods in Central Florida Home

According to Orange County, Florida fire officials an unidentified middle aged woman with grey hair left Tiger Woods home via ambulance about about 2:35 a.m. today.


An unidentified source identifies this woman as Mrs. Claus, wife of Santa Claus.


A bit of background on Claus, according to the Christmas special "Santa Claus is Comin' to Town," her name is Jessica, and is a schoolteacher in Sombertown. Elves at SantaClaus.com add that her middle name is Mary. But little more is known about this woman who prefers to live a quiet life, out of the spotlight of her husband.


Calls to Santa's Workshop at the North Pole have not been returned.

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Adventures of a colonoscopy (funny)

If you've gone through the preparations for a colonscopy, you'll appreciate this video.

I have to agree when everyone says the prep is worse than the procedure.

A bit of background... First you take a few pills to loosen up the foundation a bit. After a few hours you become aquainted with a 50 gallon drum of prep fluid, which seems innocent enough but gulping it down is no easy task. The prep kit I was given had flavor packets, I used the orange flavoring thinking this can't be much worse than orange Gatorade because Gatorade isn't all that wonderful either. It is worse than Gatorade, not so much in flavor but consistency. It's just weird.

I recommend using a straw-aiming the liquid towards the roof of your mouth and let it spray down your throat without hitting your tongue.

Then after a short period of time, the fireworks begin!


See also:

• Dave Barry: A journey into my colon -- and yours
• Poop Report: Umm, And I'll Have The Colonoscopy, Please

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Six Flags – Over Earth announced. New NASA theme park on the moon

Following Friday morning’s successful crash of a LCROSS satellite and its booster rocket into a crater near the south pole of the moon, a surprise joint venture announcement was made between Six Flags and NASA, “Six Flags – Over Earth” a zero gravity water theme park is scheduled to break ground in Spring 2011 and be completed by 2020.

A satellite and booster rocket, shot at the moon as a test for potable water and parking, proved to be a positive low cost location for a gigantic entertainment complex which promises to eclipse the earth. Water slides, trampolines and character parades are only a few attractions slated for the new theme park.

"This is so cool," said Jerry Smith, coordinator for Six Flag’s “Over Earth” campaign. "We're thrilled."

"This is going to change where we take summer vacations," NASA chief lunatic Michael Mal de la Cabeza said at the news conference. “No More Jersey Shore for us”

Photos and artists renderings are to be released in the next few weeks.

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New York Times Wins Five Pulitzer Prizes

NEW YORK — The New York Times won five Pulitzer Prizes in journalism on Monday, the second-most in its history. It was a bittersweet victory for The Times as all five writers had been laid off their awards are being added to 101 other Pulitzers that were won over the years, the first awarded in 1917 and being sold on eBay to pay late utility bills.

Other icons of industry in New York are fighting the economy too, The Empire State Building has assessed a $5 look up zone around the skyscraper on 34 Street to anyone walking while looking up. According to building officials, it is a nominal fee and only applies to a small percentage of passersby.

The New York MTA is implementing a pay as you go fee, deputizing subway break dancers to collect $1 surcharge per passenger or walk. This will not apply during rush hours or after 2am.

And the familiar yellow cabs are going high tech. If you ride a yellow cab, it's going to cost you to turn down the volume on the in-cab video screens. $1 for every db, up to $5 for mute.

Everyone is being affected by tough times, help stimulate the economy and recycle your unused Pulitzers, Emmys, Grammys and other gold awards.

Renegade News! The News We Twist To Fit
April 20, 2009

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