MPAA Releases New Movie Ratings

Hold onto your nachos, you're about to see some new movie ratings this Christmas. The Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA) is releasing new movie ratings starting with the holiday films. The MPAA film-rating system is used in the United States and its territories to rate a film's suitability for certain audiences, based on its content. The MPAA rating system is...

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Theologists celebrating discovery of lost religion

Theologists are celebrating their recent discovery of a lost religion. What scholars had written off as lost a long time ago was discovered, quite by accident, thriving in New York City. The Procrastenazi Apatharian religion is alive and living in Brooklyn, New York. Procrastenazi Apatharian, also known as Procrastenazi Apats or simply Procrastenazis, are a Apatharian...

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Hospital Acquired Infections (HAI): An untapped profit center

As Hospitals look inward for new business, elevator buttons are realized as a revenue generator. Skit Tjänsten, a leading patient management group, recently concluded a 5 year study on medical facility lost profits. The goal of the study was to balance the number of patients checking out (ie: lost business) with new business.  Hospital Acquired Infections (HAI) was...

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Does a shorter tweet affect your civil liberties?

Twitter, the social-media giant made popular by brief 140 character messages shared over the internet, is planning on cutting their Tweeters by 8%.  Depending on the math, rounding the fractions, the shorter tweets will be a max of 129 or 130 characters after the reorganization. Our Wall Street sources told us on Tuesday morning that Twitter's CEO tweeted a DM to...

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The pros and cons of FedEx using cheaper alien technology

The shift in consumer preference toward slower/lower-cost delivery options have contributed to the birth of 51Ex, a budget delivery option introduced by FedEx that possibly uses Area51 alien technology. 51Ex transports packages from a local source point directly to a delivery truck already en route to the residential consumer. As good as this sounds, the science fiction solution...

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Recharge your Tesla from an iPhone at 80 Km/h

This week Schlockcharge was officially launched in 4 European countries, connecting Tesla drivers in the Netherlands, Germany, Switzerland, and Austria to their cell phones in a brand new way. Mobile phone consumers in these newly-energized countries can now enjoy convenient, electric trips on the German Autobahn and to destinations in the Alps and elsewhere thanks to the...

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ATM Network distributes free MP3 Music

According to some infotainment program, the same ATM that gives you money, also can give you free music. To take advantage of the free music download, enter your PIN # as 8675309.  If you are prompted to enter only 4 digits as the PIN, ignore that and enter 8-6-7-5-3-0-9.  You will be prompted to select a song from the daily download offers, grouped by genre....

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Standardized height requirements for concerts (Editorial)

Should live music venus ban tall people? It’s another Saturday night and you hear the call of the small, “hey you’re standing in front of me.” A person is annoyed because they can’t see the band. It’s crowded. Everyone wants to see. Half the crowd wants to be up front on the rail. The room is jumping with music fanatics. They’re tall, short, fat and skinny.  It’s...

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Exyzee app targets the embarrassing open fly

One of the better software innovations of the year is Exyzee. If you’ve ever been alerted X-Y-Z in a meeting, classroom or on the train, this hot new app is for you. Designed to work with tiny computer chips already woven into clothing, the app running on your mobile device identifies your pants by a unique identification code embedded in the RFID chip and analyzes 3 factors....

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Sea Turtle Rehab Center To Open In Times Square

This November, joining Spiderman, Sponge Bob, The Naked Cowboy and dozens of larger-than-life neon signs is a Sea Turtle Rehabilitation Center. Few people know that Midtown Manhattan is the third largest sanctuary for the urban loggerhead sea turtle (Caretta urbana). The urban loggerhead is considered an endangered species and are protected by the International Union for...

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USB plug-n-pour water generator

The water crisis is over.  Hydrofax of Santa Clara just announced a USB based water generator. The creators of USB water claim it isolates hydrogen atoms, bonds them to oxygen and produces water, from thin air.   Water has been flowing from prototypes in Southern California for several months. California state legislators have kept a pretty low profile on...

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Seedless Web - Pot delivery with no seeds, no stems, no worries

Our Renegade News social media desk has seen a preview of tomorrow's web based delivery.  With legalization of marijuana comes enterprise. Seedless 420 Mon LLC is set and ready to launch their "Seedless Web" service. At first glance it appears seedless stemmed from the popular seamless food delivery site but seedless stressed it did not grow out of the similar site and...

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