Monday, February 7, 2011

AOL acquires The Huffington Post - offers free HuffPost diskettes

AOL Inc. [NYSE:AOL] announced that it has entered into a definitive agreement to acquire The Huffington Post, the influential and rapidly growing news, analysis, and lifestyle website founded in 2005, with millions of monthly visitors.


AOL Diskettes: Free Access to Huffington Post
A direct mail campaign with AOL diskettes etches a leap in the evolution of digital journalism and online engagement by guaranteeing free news access via diskette for the foreseeable future. No official word on Huff Post becoming a pay service, or of any direct mail campaign was available when this article was first published.

THIS IS A NEWS PARODY

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Starbucks' Introduces New Medusa Logo and Four Speciality Items

Have you bought a cup of *bux joe with the new icon?  The buzz on the street, "Starbuck's changes logo to Medusa" is rocking across the country and the world. According to a reliable source at an disclosed coffee shop in Toledo, Ohio, Medusa, the mythical Greek character, was chosen because it is more inline with a greater plan for global domination by Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz. And coincides with a soon to be made announcement of new caffeinated products.

There is backlash to dropping the Starbucks’ mermaid, or “Siren” icon, thousands of Facebook users protested changing the image to Medusa and a blog urged business executives to boycott the coffee until the Siren returns. Starbucks’ move also comes at a time when U.S. companies are relying more heavily on foreign sales, and a logo based on a controversial Greek character may not sit well in emerging markets.

Versace, who has a similar logo, stated "there are so many mythical characters, why Medusa? Look at Roman mythology, leave us Medusa." And no confirmation of plans for a chain of Versace Cafes.

Starbucks is expected to launch many new products in 2011. Our sources confirmed there are at least 9 new items and revealed these four:
  • Truffa - A new smaller and slightly more expensive, but much cooler, size cup with a larger Starbucks logo.
  • Bitta - A mildly caffeinated bottled water with the signature burnt coffee taste.
  • Joos - A dehydrated yellow powder when added to water gives the appearance of Orange Juice but with the signature burnt coffee taste. 
  • Phul - Single serving pouches of upscale (read "expensive") instant coffee, which will target the over 80 Nescafe and Sanka audience.
THIS IS A PARODY OF NEWS
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Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Burlington Coat Factory planned in Buraidah, Saudi Arabia

Buraidah, Saudi Arabia: An unidentified investment group is planning on converting a mosque in Buraidah, Saudi Arabia into a department store, possibly a Men's Warehouse.  

Locals said the development group has no right to build a mega department store and will be refused permits. A spokesmodel for the developers say it is not a department store, only a distribution center for other planned stores in Saudi Arabia. It just happens to have a retail area which sells clothing and accessories.

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Why prohibit the clothing chain from opening in Saudi Arabia? An official from Buraidah explains "it is not as much as they sell clothing prohibited in our country as much as retail stores represent capitalism and capitalism represents greedy American capitalists and therefore should be prohibited in the kingdom." 

this is a parody of the news 

Thursday, July 8, 2010

The Ballad Of BP's Tony Hayward - song parody

PARODY song
The Ballad Of BP's Tony Hayward
based on the tune Jed Clampett by Lester Flatt and Earl Scruggs


Renegade News! The News We Twist To Fit

Saturday, May 8, 2010

The iSup device from APPLE coming soon. From the makers of iPod, iPhone and iPad

Negative feedback from Apple's iPad User Annoyance Group (UAG) has expedited Apple R&D to launch the next generation of wireless mobile devices. In the third quarter of 2010 the world will be introduced to brand new technology from Apple and Boehringer-Ingelheim. An undisclosed source
says the new product addresses elbow space with mobile technology on public transportation, whether it be airplanes, buses or trains. 
"iPad users need more elbow room than ever. Bumping elbows with neighbors in adjoining seats is unacceptable behavior from our iCommunity"
— an undisclosed source.


The iSup, in alpha testing, is designed to give customers a greater user experience without the elbow annoyance factor. iSup combines two devices, linked via a wireless connection. The iDisplay is about the size of an iPad without the touch screen. The iDisplay links to a wireless controller about the size of a D Cell battery. The suppository device contains nano-technology activated by intestinal bacteria and creates a Colonet™, transmitting directly to the iDisplay. Since iSup is controlled like a touch-pad via the sphincter, elbow space becomes a non-issue. Engineers promise a smaller version of iSup when it is released into beta testing.  Alpha testers can operate the iSup for up to two hours before muscle fatigue sets in--Interaction designers are working on less muscle movement to extend dexterity and usefulness.


Apple Inc.(Public, NASDAQ:AAPL) designs and creates iPod and iTunes, Mac laptop and desktop computers, the OS X operating system, and the revolutionary iPhone and iPad.

THIS IS A PARODY OF NEWS