Tuesday, January 18, 2022

Cootie Shot 22

The common cootie shot has been re-engineered to protect against SARS-CoV-2 aka the novel Coronavirus.

Coronaviruses (CoV) are a large family of viruses that cause illness ranging from the common cold and cooties to more severe diseases. A novel coronavirus (nCoV) is a new strain that has not been previously identified in humans.

To be fully effective wait about a week or so after the cootie shot is administered. The vaccine, known as “Cootie 22”, is given the same way as the original cootie shot, first used 65 years ago to protect children from getting the cooties from their pals on the playground. 

Vaccinated individuals must follow a strict protocol to stay protected when risk of exposure is evident.
  • Always carry your cootie card which identifies you as being vaccinated.
  • Have your vaccine card in hand and be ready to flash it when outdoors and you come within 6 feet of another person, or when entering an indoor establishment such as restaurants, libraries, government buildings, etc. 
  • If you think you were exposed, immediately shout “Cootie Shot” and simultaneously flash your card.
  • IF YOU LOSE YOUR COOTIE SHOT CARD you can temporarily go old school and pinch your arm while yelling “Cootie shot” 
COVID-19 is a serious worldwide pandemic and none of the information presented here is factual. Do not take this article serioiusly.  If you recently had a cootie shot, it ain't no good. Consult your healthcare provider regarding a COVID-19 vaccine.




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