Sunday, March 3, 2013

Vatican 2.0 seeking Pope via Matchmaker Service

The Vatican is going high tech in their papal search. Rome-based Papal Encounter launched in 2000 and now the #1 Trusted Holy Relationship Services Provider in the Vatican has been contracted to select the Pope.

Choosing a pope has always been done by  a meeting of the College of Cardinals, prone to long debates and very unscientific. Over 30 traits of 2.0 are electronically reviewed before the new Bishop of Rome (aka the Pope) is matched.

An inside source at the Vatican told Renegade News the church needed a way to get in touch with today's youth. Reaching out via high tech is the obvious solution.

Another 2.0 announcement, a smoke-free Vatican. No toxic plumes of white or black smoke--The papal conclave tweets the results, hashtag #pickapope.

Papal Encounter's patented Papal Compatibility System® allows bishops and cardinals to be quickly matched with a higher authority whom they are likely to enjoy a long-term relationship. Millions of church leaders of all national origins have applied to use Papal Encounter's Papal Compatibility System and have been rejected. Today, an average of one Papal Encounter member becomes Pope as a result of being matched on the site.

*Papal Encounter is only available in the Vatican City.

THIS IS A PARODY OF NEWS